God cares about your HEART!

"He has shown you, O mortal, what is good.
And what does the Lord require of you?
To act justly and to love mercy
and to walk humbly with your God."
Micah 6:8

The Lord does care about what I do, what I accomplished and so on, but he cares more about my heart and where it stands! This verse has quickly reminded me that God wants me to simply act justly and to love mercy! Being respectful and having humility is an important tool that I've learned and put into practice throughout this internship. As this internship comes to an end, I'm very excited to throw out and live what I have received from this program and all the revelations i've been having about my character has really helped shaped my life into something greater than I thought! The Lord is good and I believe that the best is yet to come!

Lord,
Heal my heart and make it clean! I want to live for you and you only. Lead me to do things that will glorify you and live a life that will transform in a way that will benefit my relationship with you!
I LOVE YOU,
AMEN!

God Has A Sense of Humor

So for the past week and a half, I have been learning intensely about discipline through dependence. Though our character classes, I have been learning about dependence and through my mentorship time with TJ, I have been learning about discipline. I blogged earlier about how I put them together to form the phrase "discipline through dependence." God has been confirming that through many different ways, but the funniest way was this past Sunday when I was helping out at Children's Ark. I was sitting down making sure the kids behaved during the lesson when I started to listen to the video that was playing. The girl on the video was talking about how when times get hard we need to look to Jesus and remember what He did and that will help us through our rough times. How ironic that I am memorizing that in Hebrews 12, which says, "Let us run, with endurance, the race that is set before us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross..." God, You really do have a sense of humor where you even used a Children's Ark lesson to reaffirm what You want to teach me in this season.

Finish STRONG!

My body has been really sore from our corporate workout this past Saturday with Tate.

We did about 150 pushups, 150 situps, and 150 lunges.

That's a lot.

When we were working out, I wanted to really give up. I was becoming afraid, because everyone was beating and finishing before me.

I was falling behind.

Everyone was already on their second set for their workouts, while I was still struggling with my first set. I wanted to desperately give up and stop. I could have thrown up and towel and say, "Enough! I don't want to finish!"

At several points, I paused. It was like an internal battle inside my head. I was fighting and deciding if I should finish up or give up on the spot.

Then I kept repeating and saying to myself,

"Finish strong. Finish strong. Finish STRONG!

Suffer the pain of REGRET or suffer the pain of discipline!

Don't be normal! Don't be mediocre!

Don't give up! Finish strong! Finish Strong! FINISH STRONGGGGG!!!!!"

And I finally finished it.

Though I was the last one, I was able to do MORE than 150 pushups, 150 situps, and 150 lunges (I did more than what was required for the set).

I say this not to brag or boast (the pain and stiffness I felt days after really humbles me, ahahahahaha), but to say that I was able to not give up and continue to push. And....

Finish STRONG.

Armor Bearer - Mr. and Mrs. Higashi

We had an amazing Fire Side Chat with Mr. and Mrs. Higashi. As, Mr. Higashi gave us a nice example about his God's calling to be an Armor Bearer. An Armor Bearer "was a person responsible to take care of the king, officer or other leader. His job was to refresh, protect and assist his officer" (solidrockcog.com).

Mr. Higashi joyfully explained his calling and sometimes when he should act like as, an Armor Bearer. Also, I saw happiness on his face as he explained that.

I asked myself. How can he find joy being an Armor Bearer since it was the hardest position ever? An Armor Bearer is always close to the person who is more attacked all the times during peace or war.

I could connect his example with something that I read in the book Irresistible Church "when we remember who we are, we're able to act on who we are" (38). Plus, "we can find joy and satisfaction in our true identity" (39).

In conclusion, Mr. and Mrs. Higashi are sure about their true identity in Christ and it makes them happy even in the hardest task/position since they know who they are in Christ.

Thank you so much Mr. and Mrs. Higashi.

ONE on ONE

Last winter break I was asked to help lead the song Amazing Grace (My chains are Gone) during worship, and this past Sunday I was asked to do it again. Usually I have to continually tell myself that I should not be nervous or anxious because if I am worried that means I am more concerned about pleasing the audience then the Father, because there is nothing to be nervous about serving God. But regardless of how many times I tell myself this the butterflies still come and the thoughts of technicalities like pitch and timing still consume my head.

But this sunday was different...

My Mentor, Pastor Rick met with me the Friday before this Sunday and on this day I really got to share my heart with Him about my worries of trying to be the ideal Christian. PERFECT was what I was trying to be... and when I wasn't I tore myself apart with criticism. Pastor Rick is amazing and such a blessing, just me being able to talk with him really let me realize where my Focus needs to be...JESUS..."duhhh right!", but its hard even when I am serving in ministry, my focus gets distracted and my heart behind it might not always be for Jesus.

Revelation: Think JESUS!

So on Sunday before I started singing, I listened for my counts but told myself to "WORSHIP HIM" forget who is in the crowd and sing for the one who created you, sing for the one who died for you, sing to JESUS!

So I sang... and regardless of what I sounded like... :) I experienced a heart felt worship one on one with Jesus Christ... ONE on ONE, me and Him... JESUS CHRIST!

All smiles!

Acai Tree

Hosea 14:8

"... I am like a flourishing juniper; your fruitfulness comes from me."

I made this illustration with the fruit acai because I am from Brazil... Hehe!

A lot of times I thought that God has called me because of my talents... so silly...

God gave me talents to use to glorify His name and He chose me for who I am not for what I do.

Prayer: Dear Lord, thank you for the gifts you gave to me and please teach me how to use it for your Glory and please don't let me take my talents thinking that they are mine. In Jesus name, Amen.

I can’t believe that this Legacy internship is almost over. We have about two more weeks left and God is still  transforming all of our lifes. We have learned so much that and  pray to God that all the knowlegde and wisdom that we learned can all stick to our heads, but unfortunately God didn’t create us that way. Its okay though because God only knows why His places the wisdom and knowlegde in our hearts that he wants us to learn. These two weeks are going to fly, but Gods hand and Spirit will surround us.

God is good!

God has been so good to me throughout my whole time in Legacy. This will be my last week and i'm definately going to miss it a whole lot. God has been teaching me about my character and my heart! These two main tools that I have been working on really helped shaped where I am at today and if it was not for the Holy spirit, I don't think I would have lived a life pleasing to God. With all that I learned and all the wisdom that was poured upon me, my perspective in life has shifted and has gained a greater insight to what God has called me to do. After the internship, I plan on continuing to help out in New Hope Manoa until I leave for school in August. I believe that all that I have learned will/has benefit me in all areas of my life!

NH East Shore...The Relational Church

This morning, I got the blessing and privilege to visit and help out at New Hope East Shore all the way at Kailua High School. For a Waipahu-guy, that is far away! But it was good visiting Kailua on the other side of the island.

It was comforting to see Stephan (One of the other legacy interns), Pastor Glenn, and Pastor Rick. But one of the things that I noticed was how hospitable and welcoming everyone at New Hope East Shore was.

At 8 AM, I came to help set up and was greeted by several people. I got sit in the worship rehearsal. I even got free 7-11 Spam Musubis (How awesome for a 1st time visitor??)!

But I could see how the staff, volunteers, and church people were so close to each other and I could tell it was "ohana." Carolyn Shima (She spoke at the past Fireside Chat) was right in her description of how NH East Shore was very "relational" and had a big focus on relationships.

I enjoyed the warm hospitality that I was welcomed with. It was awkward (that happens regardless at any first time visit or experience), but I had lots of fun and enjoyed the small, homey, church atmosphere.

There was even one of the church ladies, Francis, who went by every chair and said hello to every person and asked how they were doing. I also got to meet a nice lady named Nat and she was definitely a prayer warrior! It was fun setting up the table cloths before church service.

I had lots of thoughts and observations about the church. I could have placed a narrow-minded mode and create a list of critiques of "This is wrong or Why are the doing such and such..." on and on...but I didn't. I observed a warm hospitality described the verses,

"Rendering service with a good will as to the Lord and not to man," (Ephesians 6:7 ESV)

"Show hospitality to one another without grumbling." (1 Peter 4:9 ESV)

Big thanks to my friend and fellow intern Stephan-You are awesome! You have a great singing voice and it was fun hanging out with you! :-) Thanks Pastor Rick for your encouraging and timely message. Thanks Pastor Glenn and all the volunteers at NH East Shore for your warm hospitality. And thanks to the church people of NH East Shore. May you guys develop into an irresistible church to heaven and not to men.

"As a result of your ministry, they will give glory to God. For your generosity to them and to all believers will prove that you are obedient to the Good News of Christ."
2 Corinthians 9:13 (NLT)

Hebrews 5:11 "Concerning him we have much to say and it is hard to explain, since you have become dull of hearing"

There is so much more to know about God, in fact it unattainable to grasp all knowledge about God, but becoming distracted from the World makes knowing anything about Him difficult.

I have so much more to learn so much more to know about, God but have I been making things harder for myself to hear Him speak, because I have been distracting my self with so much busy work within the ministry? I think it is so important that I pray and constantly check and scrub my heart. I need to seek and listen for His voice and instead of being distracted with so much work, use those tasks that God puts before me to seek out Him. God is speaking to me all the time... ALL THE TIME but its me who needs to work on my LISTENING!

right now.

Tonight I was about ready to go to bed when my roommate got home, and started telling me about her day. It's been pretty normal for us to chit-chat about being tired and maybe a little overwhelmed, since both of us are always super busy. But tonight was different. Some of the stuff she's having to deal with was pretty intense and was weighing her down. So God prompted me to pray for her. I was a little hesitant because I've never done that for her and we aren't really super close. But I obeyed. And it was really cool to see God use that to comfort her and bring her peace.
During the time I've been here, we have had three other girls living in our apartment, but now it's down to just us. One girl came for two weeks and then left. It seemed kinda random...but really, it wasn't random at all. One thing that she said a lot was "God had a reason for making us roommates, even if it's only for two weeks." And I think that was the reason: for that reminder. Tonight, I realized that God has the two of us living here for a reason, its not just random.
Another thing I thought about was a response that Aaron Nunez wrote on my paper about why I am here. I had written that I thought God had me here to grow me and prepare me for the future. But Aaron posed the question, "What if what God is doing right now is for something He wants to do right now?" If I am constantly preparing myself for the future, the present will pass me by and I will miss all that God has for me right now. If God wants to use me to minister to my roommate right now, I can't let it pass by because "I'm not prepared yet.". I want to be a blessing to her now, because I may never see her again after I leave. I believe that everything happens for a reason, and that God has a plan and purpose for everything. He wants to use me right now. I am willing.

truth

Something so cool that He has been doing in my time out here has been allowing me to understand things about myself, Him, and life in a more organized and prioritized way.

I used to drown in is confusion, because of an inability to stand on truth as Truth, and it would cause me to get so discouraged.
I feel more organized and put together, more grounded in God's truth and stronger in the sense that I am finding victory in things that used to easily drag me off course from pursuing Him.

I've begun to enjoy the excitement of learning that scripture and Truth straight-up allow me to realign my wavering flesh back onto the Truth about my place in God's story and my identity as His child...like seriously we can tell ourselves "No, Billy, wherever that thought came from, it's not true and THIS is how you should be thinking," and it listens!!! :)

But at the same time, I have also seen how weak and unable I am to even enter into that process. It's hard:/ Sometimes it feels like I just can't do it. I don't have the energy or might to drag myself before the Lord and call on His strength.

So, "Let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking to Jesus the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him, endured the cross.." Hebrews 12:1-2

Comw with Boldness to the Throne of God

For we do not have a High Priest who cannot sympathize with our weaknesses, but was in all points tempted as we are, yet without sin. Let us therefore come boldly to the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy and find grace to help in time of need.

Hebrews 4:15-16

I love verse 15 which explains that we have a God that has sympathy over our weaknesses. And He sympathizes because He also endured hard time and temptations, but He also overcame all of that. Sympathy can be described as when one person stands along side another person, closely understanding their situation (wikipedia). It can also be in relationship between persons wherein whatever affects one similarly affects the other (merrian-webster.com). God sympathizes, He is side by side in our struggles and He knows that if we believe that He overcame sin than we can also overcome sin. Because of the relationship that God desires to have with us, when we are weak He is strong for us.

Knowing this gives us a duty, to come before God's throne when we need Him. But scripture says to come "BODLY" to the throne of grace! To have courage and security that as bad as we are He will still love us. That there is nothing that we can do to escape His love. And even when we think we do not deserve it we must have courage to come before Him. Also having courage because God is a Just God and we must accept the consequences of our sin. Even though God has sympathy for us, He will allow consequences so that we can learn and Grow. But the great thing is that He will stand by our side through the consequences!

I need to always remember that as bad as I mess things up, God will stand by me. And when I do make mistakes that I can come into His presence and receive mercy! I must not be afraid of the circumstances because the Lord will be with me. God I pray that I can have enough courage to come before you and lay everything at your feet. Knowing that even though I will face hard consequences I can run to you in times of need. Help me understand this and live it!

Plans!

Wow; I have so much plans for myself. But God has huge and greater plans for my life. Today I lead a small group with Pastor Justin, Christie and Devin. God impressed upon my heart "Hosea 6:6- I want you to show love,not offer sacrifices. I want you to know me more than I want burnt offerings." Now I did this, not knowing how far He would take this. Then Pastor Justin made us spend about 34 minutes with God. Letting Him reveal himself to us, whether through drawing or a word. I received a drawing. I didn't draw this picture in a long time. This picture is of God. I learned this in Old Testament Survey by Gary Lau. I was sitting in the Kaua'i room, I was getting frustrated because I wanted to be still. But my mind was going everywhere. Then He lead me to the board to draw this picture. Then he replied,"I am the same God who brought the Israelites out of Egypt. And I am the same God today." Wow; God is most definitely moving in the life of His servants! Thank you Lord for just revealing yourself to me. I love you Lord!

FUSE WEST!

Fuse west is full of AWESOME people who pour out so much love and support to the community around and also us interns. The experience is very humbling and through discipline and a couple slaps i was able to be stretched into more of a "servant of God", which is what I am called to be. God showed me how it was like to truly serve through the volunteers there. The joy they have in serving and the selflessness they show to the people who need help physically or even spiritually, opened my eyes to what serving is suppose to be. The leaders and volunteers there have helped me to continue in striving to become a more submissive and joyful servant.

PRAISE DA LORDT!!!

they'll turn to dust and leave you empty handed

For she said, 'I will go after my lovers,
who give me my bread and my water,
my wool and my flax, my oil and my drink.'Hosea 2:5

What do I mistake as bread and water, wool and flax, besides Jesus?
Comfort, friends, intelligence, good-standing before others (causing compromise), and many more.

I continue to forget how much I am Christ's. That any comfort I receive outside of my identity as God's son, any validation by my friends (believers or not), any praise from men will ultimately arrive at despair and emptiness.
To receive life from anywhere but God, is to abandon my wholeness in Christ.
Reminded of paul - For his sake I have suffered the loss of all things and count them as rubbish, in order that I may gain Chris and be found in him, not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but that which comes through faith in Christ, the righteousness from God that depends on faith
philippians 3:7-9

There simply isn't ANY validation, ANY lasting comfort, ANY restoration towards wholeness outside of who I am in Christ.

Lord, I am embarrassed at how stupid I am. You have shown me time and time again that you are everything, that everything I strive for outside of you and your purpose is meaningless. Yet I continue to find myself chasing them. You are so patient God, thank you for pardoning me from what I truly deserve.
Will you show me the deep emptiness of things not of you, and would you please give me an even greater understanding of your richness, so that other things are exposed for what they really are.

freedom.

"Since the children have flesh and blood, he too shared in their humanity so that by his death he might break the power of him who holds the power of death—that is, the devil—and free those who all their lives were held in slavery by their fear of death." - Hebrews 2:14-15 (NIV)

Christie Lynn Sinclair: Jesus Christ, in all His perfection and holiness, came to earth to become HUMAN like you, to DIE so that He could BREAK the power of the devil to free you from being a slave to fear. This fear that you have lived with all your life is like saying, "Jesus, what You did for me isn't enough. When You died to bring me freedom, it was nice, but not all that I needed." 
Girl, Jesus covered it. Don't you discount what He did for you by continuing to live in what He payed for with His death. 
In His name, chains are GONE.
Fear has no hold on you anymore. It never should have, because Jesus took care of that. But you have listened to the lies of the enemy. So stop now, and walk in the freedom you have in Christ.

FLY, FIGHT, and WIN

I was looking over my notes from Farrington Campus service last weekend where we honored the soldiers who have served to keep this country safe and free. The worship team sang military songs also we had a video showing the soldiers in duty also their motto that were really nice.

I am Brazilian and I don't know much about the independence of this country. Therefore, I know that July 4th is the Independence Day of The United States Of America. Country which I dearly love since I have learned a lot over here.

My favorite motto is the U.S Air Force, which says "Aim High! Fly. Fight. Win". As a result, I looked for more information about it and I find the statement below in the official web site of the U.S. Air Force.


"The call and the response are two sides of the same coin," said Air Force Chief of Staff Gen. Norton Schwartz. "Airmen indicated 'Aim High' and the response 'Fly-Fight-Win' as indicative of their enduring commitment to do just that in defense of our nation."

Moreover, Pr Elwin Ahu sermon touched my life as he said "fight for freedom". Freedom from worry, guilt, and consequences of sin that were the key points of the sermon. Galatians 5:1 says "It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery" (NIV). Also, he said "stop walk in circle and fly" (Pr. Elwin Ahu).

As a result, I felt on my heart the God's calling like as the U.S Air Force motto. I MUST endure in my commitment to defend my freedom, which has given through God's grace. I will FLY, FIGHT, and WIN

Colossians 1:17

Colossians 1:17

“17And he is before all things, and in him all things hold together.”

Observation: Jesus is not just the center of our lives, He is the center of all life. “in Him all things hold together.” Jesus is the sinew of our lives. He holds all things together. He also goes before all things, as the firstborn of creation. He is the head of the house, the keeper of things, and master of all.

Application:

I need to remember that God holds all things in His hands alone. He doesn't share power, and He will work all things out the way He desires them. I need to trust in His authority, letting Him speak in to my life. I need to trust in his provision, that He has a path for me, and that He will place me where He needs me.

Communication

I am still learning. Constantly learning.

When I got the opportunity to hear some of my peers preach sermons they prepared, it made me evaluate myself too (even though I wasn't going to give a sermon). I was there to give feedback and constructive criticism to my peers in regards to their body language, sermon content, and overall delivery in their communication.

But as I sat there in the chair, I realized,

I need to learn and practice more of how I communicate and preach.

Even though I have some experience speaking in front of large groups, I think I still need to refine how I communicate and define more of my preaching "style." Because personally for me, it is important to constantly refine and improve my preaching. Preaching is not just speaking, but it is communicating and speaking about God's Word.

That is a huge responsibility.

I need to make sure I am not lazily putting sermons together at the last minute or feeding "instant microwave dinners" to the people.

In the seasons when I don't necessarily get opportunities to preach onstage, I still need to work on my preaching.

Being in this internship and being involved in so many ministries has helped me realized how I still need to be teachable and practice. Not to get lazy, but to diligently focus on what I need to improve and learn in what I communicate.

Even if it takes a long time practicing in front of an empty room or mirror, or writing sermons for the sake of practice instead of, "Oh, I'm preaching next week, so I need to prepare a message."

I really enjoy and love the art of communication. I commit to practicing and refining my skill in this area.

I take Paul's advice to heart, when he told young Timothy,

"Preach the word; be ready in season and out of season; reprove, rebuke, and exhort, with complete patience and teaching" (II Timothy 4:2 ESV)